13 December 2004 (Monday)
501
I realized over the weekend that I neglected to mention an important hair-covering consideration in my recent post about covering my hair at work. My swearing-in to the Massachusetts Bar is tomorrow morning. Because I felt so strongly about covering my hair during the bar exam, it seemed only appropriate to wear a hat for the swearing-in as well. However, the only question asked of me when I requested hair-covering permission for the exam was, "Do you cover your hair at all other times?" At that time, I could honestly answer, "Yes."* Furthermore, in order to wear a hair covering in my passport photo, I must submit "a signed statement...verifying the item is worn daily for religious purposes...." Granted, my current passport is valid until 2009, but I would prefer that my next passport photo accurately reflect my usual traveling appearance (hair covered) and I'd rather not commit perjury in order to effect that.
So, one of the other factors that went into my recent hair-covering decision was a preference for consistency and legal accuracy. I now feel no qualms about attesting that my hats and/or scarves are part of my religiously-mandated daily attire, and tomorrow I will accept my bar admission certificate with pride...and a beret.
* I think it was acceptable for me to assume they meant "in public" or "outside of your home." I do not cover my hair at home, even when there are men present besides my husband and/or my father. I also do not cover my hair in private settings where there are only other women and/or young children around. However, neither the bar exam, my workplace, nor the swearing-in ceremony fit these criteria, so I feel my answer was appropriate.
Did that change since you got married? Didn't you used to cover your hair at home in front of other men? Or am I remembering wrong?
When we first got married, I did not cover my hair in my own home, no matter who was there. A few months later, we invited another newly-married couple over for Shabbat lunch. We had a feeling that the wife was struggling with this particular mitzvah, and there were no other married women coming over for that meal. I decided that, in order to make her more coomfortable, I would leave my hair covered while that couple was over. It wasn't that uncomfortable, so after Shabbat I decided I would try covering my hair at home as well, whenever other men (besides Julian and my dad) were around.
Over the course of about a year, I discovered just how annoying this can be, particularly with male houseguests, so I switched back to the original model. I'm not sure I have the best halachic footing for this decision (my strongest reasoning is "If you're in my home and you don't know I'm married, you don't belong here"), but that's where I stand at the moment. Pun intended.
